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09 August 2007 @ 09:26 pm
why do I always manage to fall for a guy that doesnt want me back

john and i broke up before I left for LA in July..
came back, he helped me move last week, seemed like old times, lots of flirting and mixed messages..
he tells me today he had a date the other night...

why can he move on but I cant?
I still like him
and he wants to be friends
and while I had fun last week just hanging out being friends
i still felt like there was something there

so maybe friends isnt a good idea since i obviously can't dettach myself

but I don't know anyone else in Ithaca now
and I don't have a job
or money
and I miss my sister

i hate being negative.. and im reading about all this power of affirmation.. law of attraction stuff.. and it makes sense.. but It's so hard to be positive about things sometimes... but I know that being down about all of this isnt going to get me anywhere but upset..

i think its just easier to be sad
happy takes more effort

tomorrows another day
and this too shall pass...
serabelleserabelle on August 10th, 2007 01:06 pm (UTC)
oh hon that's awful :( love unrequited is the worst. i think you need to rent "The Holiday" and watch that. it's a love unrequited empowering movie. (does that sound silly or what?) anyway, i think it was pretty good.

it has to be hard for you to be away from mel all the time, i hope you guys get to live closer one day.

so how was LA? was it everything you wished?
Melissadivamisa on August 11th, 2007 09:48 pm (UTC)
LA was really good and I am glad I got to go! I have seen the Holiday and loved it! Im hoping to see mel sometime soon, but at least again at christmas. It's hard to go for so long not seeing her! I might just move out to Portland if nothing comes my way in this next year...